Not long ago, someone I had just met (an acquaintance I barely knew) asked me to introduce them to someone important in my network.
“Hey, can you introduce me to this person? I saw you're connected on LinkedIn. Thanks!”
It really irritated me. I wasn’t sure why at first. I love helping people and making introductions. I usually do it instinctively. But something about this one felt off. Maybe it was how they phrased it, or maybe it was how casually they assumed I’d say yes.
So I started thinking more about relationships, specifically, the difference between transactional and non-transactional ones, and how social capital plays a role. I wanted to dig into why some asks feel generous and easy, while others feel like a withdrawal from an account that was never funded in the first place. Around the same time, I came across an article called Dissecting Social Capital, which frankly inspired much of this piece and got me thinking even more.
In this article, I’ll break down the theory of social capital, building trust with others in your community, and how to make sure you’re leaving every interaction with the right impression.
Whether you realize it or not, every conversation is either earning you trust or costing you. Don't make the mistakes most people do.
What is Social Capital?
First, it's important to understand what social capital is. The cleanest definition I’ve seen is that it’s the accumulated goodwill, reputation, and trust you’ve built up with other people. You earn social capital by being helpful, generous, dependable, and credible.
You build social capital when you help a friend land their dream job by making an introduction, prepping them for interviews, and helping them negotiate the offer, without expecting anything in return. You earn their trust, and they see you in a more positive light, which later on can be translated into reciprocity. You become someone they want to help back someday.
Social capital behaves a lot like financial capital. It has three key traits: